Recovery Continues Book - Masturbation And Sexual Sobriety?

Why do I find it necessary to include freedom from any form of sex with myself (masturbation) as part of my sexual sobriety?

Masturbation for me means escape from reality. It is a mood-altering, mind-altering experience – an addictive drug. When I first began masturbating, it was not connected with any mental imagery. The physical sensation helped blank out my mind – a mindless retreat from reality. I would lose total contact with the world, others, and myself. It wasn’t long, however, before masturbation took on the second and, for me, the permanent form of being my driven by images. I would use pictures or conjure from mind or memory an imaginary sex partner. This second form may have been trying to fill the emotional deficit in my life; a surrogate Connection. What I didn’t realize was that conjuring up a sex partner from within seems to be a division of myself. Each act drove me further into that dreadful isolation. I was slowly losing me.

Masturbation lights the fuse, sets me up so I lose control again – the ”first drink” that gets me drunk and out of control, unable to stop.

 

              Another member says, “I find myself drinking before I ever star masturbating. The first drink is the first lust thought I consciously entertain. Lust acts as a narcotic in my bloodstream so that I have to masturbate. I’ve heard it said in AA that taking a drink is the last thing I do on a slip. And masturbation is the last thing I do on a slip. Masturbation is the result; lust is the underlying problem.”

 

Thanks God there’s a remedy for both!

 

Masturbation And Sexual Sobriety - Recovery Continues Book, Page 3, 4

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