How Can I Tell If I’m Addicted?

You have to come to the realization for yourself.

Recognizing our own powerlessness is what we call “working the First Step.” As the First Step states, “We admitted we were powerless over lust—that our lives had become unmanageable.” 

It takes time and often a lot of pain to admit we are defeated. Sooner or later, we say something like, “I give up!” or “I need help!” or “I can’t do this by myself any more!” Each of these statements is an admission of powerlessness.

That is why it does not work when we try to get sober for somebody else, like a family member or employer. We have to admit defeat to ourselves and we have to seek help for ourselves.

 

Test Yourself

1. Have you ever thought you needed help for your sexual thinking or behavior? 

2. That you’d be better off if you didn’t keep “giving in”?

3. That sex or stimuli are controlling you?

4. Have you ever tried to stop or limit doing what you felt was wrong in your sexual behavior?

5. Do you resort to sex to escape, relieve anxiety, or because you can’t cope?

6. Do you feel guilt, remorse or depression afterward?

7. Has your pursuit of sex become more compulsive?

8. Does it interfere with relations with your spouse?

9. Do you have to resort to images or memories during sex?

10. Does an irresistible impulse arise when the other party makes the overtures or sex is offered?

11. Do you keep going from one “relationship” or lover to another?

12. Do you feel the “right relationship” would help you stop lusting, masturbating, or being so promiscuous?

13. Do you have a destructive need—a desperate sexual or emotional need for someone?

14. Does pursuit of sex make you careless for yourself or the welfare of your family or others?

15. Has your effectiveness or concentration decreased as sex has become more compulsive?

16. Do you lose time from work for it?

17. Do you turn to a lower environment when pursuing sex?

18. Do you want to get away from the sex partner as soon as possible after the act?

19. Although your spouse is sexually compatible, do you still masturbate or have sex with others?

20. Have you ever been arrested for a sex-related offense?

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